I've Been LOST Since She's Gone, The Piano She's Really On, I Don't Want You to Marry Me, Make Believe You're Debbie G

(The Pixies, Make Believe)

I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to have a hard time waiting until January 2009 for the next season of Lost to start. By then, I'm going to be fully bearded, washing pills down with vodka, and blasting the Pixies in my jeep, screaming, "WE HAVE TO GO BACK!!" (Actually, I'll probably be fully bearded long before then, and clean shaven again, without the drug problem, but still blasting the Pixies in my Mazda 626. Man, I love the Pixies.)

After last night's finale was over, I wasn't as instantly mind blown as I was after last season, with the reveal of the flash-forward, but this was so much more of a big-picture kind of thing, that it has been kind of tough to get my head around it all. I am very excited, though, for the next two seasons of concurrent storylines between the civilization group and The Island group. I might have more to say later on, after it sets in a little, but last night featured so many aspects and characters, that I was thinking earlier about who all was on the show last night, either in person or just in name, and it was a staggering amount of characters. At lunch today, I tried drawing out sort of a flow-chart, to better visualize who was tied to who, and I think I ended up confusing myself even more. See for yourself (you can click to enlarge) - though please understand that this image may be a bit disturbing, as it is direct evidence of my level of obsession with this show.



So, I figured the best way for me to conceptualize and get some thoughts down would just be to take one red line at a time and literally spell out each connection. I have no idea if this will be interesting or not, but it could take awhile. I might have to post it in more than one installment.

1. Ben Linus and Charles Widmore, aka Caleb Nichol. Obviously, they hate each other. Widmore is angry with Ben, presumably, for purging the Dharma Initiative people, and possibly for having The Island moved and preventing him from finding it (or returning to it?). Ben, clearly, blames Widmore for Alex's death, but can't kill him for some reason. It seemed like Ben's episode a few weeks ago showed him jumping through time, and that maybe he couldn't kill Widmore because Widmore was his constant. However, after last night, I'm not so sure. It is possible that by moving The Island last night, it sent Ben through some sort of time-space wormhold, in which he would need a constant, but whereas a few weeks ago I thought he could just jump back and forth, I don't think that anymore, and I think last night was his only shot. Now he's in real world time, along with the rest of the Oceanic 6.

2. Ben told Widmore that because he "changed the rules" and killed Alex, that he was going to take revenge by killing Penny. Which leads us to...

2a. If Ben wants to kill Penny, he's going to have to go through Desmond to do so. I read in an interview that Ben and Desmond have never had a scene together yet. Could be a good one if they end up colliding in season 5 or 6.

3. Widmore and Mr. Paik, Sun's father, have some sort of business relationship, though I'm sure it will be revealed to run deeper than that.

4. Widmore hired Keamy, a mercenary with a bloodlust rivaled by nobody, to find Ben at all costs and bring him back alive. Keamy was also going to follow "secondary protocol" and torch The Island. (I read in an interview - no real spoilers, I promise! - that Keamy was going about his job with such efficiency and zeal because it had something to do with his family. So, despite the fact that he is ostensibly dead in the Orchid Station, he may show back up in a flashback, or his family may show up - or be someone we already know?)

5. Keamy was killed by Ben in the Orchid Station, which in turn set off the 1.21 gigawatts of explosives on the freighter. Since we're back to Ben, ...

6. Ben's got a pretty large connection now to the Oceanic 6, in that he's now a "castaway" from The Island as well. But he's trying to get back, it seems, and he's going to help (use?) the Oceanic 6 to get back as well.

7. Ben showed up at the funeral parlor last night, scaring the crap out of both Jack and myself, after Jack busted the door in to get a look inside the coffin of ...

8. Jeremy Bentham. JEREMY BENTHAM?? Holy cow, man. Jeremy Bentham, according to Wikipedia, was a utilitarian, advocating for the greater good. The two things that stuck out about the article to me were: 1. He was one of the earliest proponents of animal rights, claiming that the benchmark of how we treat other beings (such as animals, babies, and those with disabilities) should not be based on their ability to reason, but their ability to suffer; and 2. In accordance with his will, his body was preserved and stored in a wooden cabinet at University College of London, and if the College Council's vote on any motion ends in a tie, his body will always break the tie by voting in favor of the motion. That is weird, man. God bless Wikipedia.

9. So, Jeremy Bentham is John Locke, but what we don't know is when, how, or why that name change takes place. And why do they all call him that in the future, when they all knew him on The Island as Locke?? Is it going to be, like, a Jacob (Jacob?) wrestling the angel, then changing his name to Israel, kind of thing? Or is it just an alias that he uses when travelling to South Central LA, because it sounds so down to earth??

10. John Locke. Jeremy Bentham. Whoever he is, he's dead. And, he's got to go with the Oceanic 6 back to The Island, if they ever want to get back there again. Why is that, do you ask? Could it be that he needs to be brought back to The Island in order to rise from the dead? Hmm, transporting a casket to The Island in order to have its occupant become undead. That sounds familiar, no? Sort of sounds like ...

11. Christian Shephard!! You may know him alternatively as either (a) guy who speaks for Jacob in Jacob's cabin, or (b) creepy dude holding babies in the jungle. You might also know him as ...

12. Father of Jack, or ...

13. Father of Claire, which makes Claire ...

14. Jack's half sister. Sorry, if this is getting boring.

15. Claire's also Aaron's real mom, although

16. Aaron is not only being raised by Kate, but being passed off as her own baby. Why not just say that Claire died in the crash? Probably because Kate needed some good PR before her murder trial, and a baby would make her more sympathetic.

17. Kate and Jack have the obvious long-standing connection, but I am going to enjoy the way they interact now that they're not on good terms. Hopefully there will be more slaps across the face handed out by Kate. Jack probably deserves it. The engaged, lovey dovey stuff was boring me to tears, except for the scenes with Kate in her pajamas (or lack thereof).

18. Though Jack loves Kate, he also has a bit of a thing for Juliet, who's acting skills consist entirely of showing cleavage and moving her mouth into weird positions constantly. Unfortunately, she's stuck on The Island drinking Dharma Rum, probably listening to a lot of Jimmy Buffett records.

19. Juliet was brought to The Island in the first place by everyone's favorite badguy, Ben Linus, either because he needed her to figure out the whole "women dying during pregnancy" thing, or because he was bored with all of the other women there and needed to ruin someone else's life in fruitless pursuit of sex. Could go either way.

20. Since we're back to Ben, for the time being, we can connect him to Sayid, who has become his own personal assassin, killing off whoever Ben tells him to. Sayid sometimes kills people on his own, though, such as ...

21. The guy parked outside Hurley's mental health facility last night, when he came to rescue (?) Hurley from the facility. Hurley didn't seem too surprised to see him, and they both seemed to know about this Jeremy Bentham character. It was strange that he didn't take anything with him or even change out of his bathrobe when he left ...

21a. Though he did finish his chess game with Mr. Eko. "Checkmate, Mr. Eko." Creepy. However, I find it hard to believe that even an imaginary Mr. Eko would lose to Hurley in a game of chess. Seems like simulated warfare might be an area in which Eko would excel.

My head is pounding. Part Two will have to come later, along with some good old fashioned random thoughts.

War! It Ain't Nothing But a Heartbreaker ... War! Friend Only To The Undertaker

(Edwin Starr, War)

I'm not really in the mood to write very much tonight, so this might (might) end up being my shortest Top Chef post to date. I just had to sit through the two-hour finale of Desperate Housewives on the DVR, and I'm quite certain that I am now much stupider than I was at 8:00.

Full disclosure: I found out last night who wins this season of Top Chef. I won't say who it is, and the only hint you get is that I found out last night who wins this season of Top Chef.

I'm guessing tonight's episode is going to open up with Spike sulking around the house, now that Andrew's gone. Of course, I'm wrong. Colleccio shows up at 5:45 a.m. and wakes everyone up. He looks like he's had some coffee. Their Quickfire Challenge tonight is to work the egg station at Lou Mitchell's, a breakfast joint in Chicago. Pretty cool, actually. I'm a big breakfast guy, so this is going to be interesting. Stephanie and Richard are having a hard time, and Antonia seemed to do pretty well. Dale gets bombarded by 4 orders at once, and looks like a pro. Antonia and Dale were both singled out as the best, but Antonia gets top honors, along with some sort of advantage for the ...

Elimination Challenge: They end up in an empty loft space where Padma throws down the Restaurant Wars challenge. Everybody is fully jazzed, as this is what they're all here for anyway. Antonia gets to choose her team and picks Stephanie and Richard. Dale and Lisa are going to kill each other tonight. Dale is the team's executive chef, and surprise, they're going with an Asian theme. Spike wants them all to be professional. Good luck with that.

$1500 at Whole Foods (insert obligatory Whole Foods Is Expensive joke here), then they go to Pier One Imports (this mall's got everything!) for restaurant decor. Team Douchebag (that's Lisa's team) buys a ton of Budda stuff at Pier One. Team Discovery Channel is going with a Gastro Pub menu (American style food, which Richard explains after putting massive amounts of product in his hair.

Colleccio is away tonight, and his replacement is none other than Anthony Bourdain (wearing Colleccio's blue chef's coat). He's digging Team Discovery Channel's stuff so far, and Team Douchebag might (might) be up the proverbial creek of shit, as Bourdain has travelled extensively in Asia and loves Asian food, so he's going to be a tough judge. Bourdain brings out Andrew, Jenn, Nikki and New Zealand (welcome back, everyone!) and lets each team pick one person to help out. Jenn and Nikki make the cut, and the boys are sent packing.

Lisa doesn't like Dale's Halo-Halo (holla holla!), and they start getting into it over some rice. Antonia and the rest of her team seem pretty calm thus far. I like it. Spike then puts on a suit that makes him look sort of like the scumbag younger brother of the snooty (snotty?) maitre'd from Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

Team Discovery Channel is scoring big time with every dish on their menu, except for the dessert, but they're even getting props for trying. This could be a massacre. Team Douchebag is tense, and Bourdain's not loving the Laksa. Padma likes the dumplings. They're fighting in the kitchen about the size of the portions, which you'd think they might have worked out before they cook and serve everything. They do like Dale's Halo-Halo (holla holla!), though.

Judges' Table: They're all patting themselves on the back for getting their restaurants off the ground tonight, and Stephanie, Antonia and Richard are brought out as the winners. Big surprise there. Bourdain loved them. Stephanie finally wins again, which gets her a trip for two on a culinary tour of Barcelona, Spain, including a guided wine tour and tasting. Wow! Team Douchebag trudges out all downtrodden-like. 13 minutes left. Gonna be some drama here. Man, they are getting hammered on every single dish, one of which was described as "baby food garnished with potpourri." Yikes. Send em all home!! Or, just Lisa. That would be ok with me.

We can't catch a break here! Dale gets sent packing, and Lisa is still on this show?!?!?!?! I don't get it. She SUCKS! Dale was kind of a dick, but I liked him pretty much all season. Probably because he didn't like Lisa. We heard he's opening a restaurant here in the ATL, so we'll have to check his place out after it opens. Next week they get rid of one more chef before the finals, and I'm not sure I'll be able to handle it if Lisa makes the final four.

Republicans and Democrats Can't Give You the Facts, Your Parents Won't Tell You Till You're Grown

(Uncle Tupelo, We've Been Had)

I just ate my weight in sushi.

Amanda and I just got home from a sushi-cooking class at The Cook's Warehouse in Decatur. We got an hour long discussion and demo from Joey Riley, the executive chef at Buckhead Diner, then we got to try making our own. I don't know how much everybody else made, or ate, because I was too busy stocking up for the winter. They let us make and eat as much as we wanted, so I made a tuna roll, a salmon and avocado roll, a california roll topped with tuna, salmon and avocado, then I tried my hand - successfully, I might add - with a piece of tuna nigiri and a piece of salmon nigiri. Then I made a salmon and tuna tartare roll, and a tuna, cucumber and avocado roll. After that, I made another salmon and tuna tartare roll, topped with avocado. I'm telling you, every single bite of it was awesome.

Amanda didn't eat nearly as much as I did, but most of her rolls looked much more professional than did mine. To be quite honest, though, aesthetics was a secondary concern of mine.

In other news, it looks like Obama officially took the majority of pledged delegates tonight, which is awesome, although he took a bit of a beating in Kentucky, which means HRC is gonna keep clapping and pointing excitedly from podiums for another two weeks.

But right now I am full of sushi, and I am happy. And I am ready for sleep.

Things Are Not What They Used to Be, Missing One Inside of Me, Deathly LOST This Can't Be Real, Cannot Stand This Hell I Feel

(Metallica, Fade to Black)

Wow! I thought this was a great episode, and although it was mostly just an hour of set-up for the 2-hour finale in two weeks, we still got a lot of good stuff from it, and I mean a LOT of good stuff. I was thinking of not writing until after the finale, since this was just part one, but I'd probably be on overload if I did that, so I'm gonna go ahead and get a few things down now. I'm going to have to watch this one again, though, before the finale in two weeks. Anybody want to come over and watch?

1. Was anybody else covered in goose bumps as the "Oceanic 6" got off the plane?? What a great scene, when they were reunited with their families. That was a very well shot scene, very touching, and also very humanizing, to see these people who we've pretty much only known as fighters and survivors (pardon the expression), to let us see the other side of them, their relief and their vulnerability, especially Kate and Sayid, who were heartbreakingly standing there alone while everyone else's parents came running over to hug them. I like to think Cheech found a way to calm everybody down while they were waiting, if you know what I mean.

It reminded me of the end of The Goonies, after they get away from the Fratellis and their families are all waiting there on the beach for them. So, in my analogy, that probably makes Ben Linus the "One-Eyed Willie" of the bunch? I'd say it would be Widmore, but I think Widmore's more like the rich douchebag who wants to buy the Goon Docks and evict everyone. And, naturally, Hurley is Chunk, right? I was going to link to a video of Chunk doing the truffle shuffle and go for the easy joke, but the way Hurley brought Sayid over to meet his parents made me think this one was a bit more fitting.

2. I don't know about you, but I was so happy to see Sawyer cock his rifle and head out with Jack to find the helicopter. I can appreciate that they've added some depth to his character lately, showing him being nicer to Hurley and caring about Claire and the baby, but did anybody else notice how he gave the baby a little kiss before handing him off to Kate? That was a bit much. Come on, man. Sack up and go kill some bad guys!

3. 4-8-15-16-23-42. AWESOME!! In the camaro, man, that was creepy! I've always wanted to give that as my fake phone number, but I've never had the balls to do it, or been in a situation where I've needed to give a fake phone number. (481) 516-2342. Like that wouldn't be so fun to do. If 481 were an actual area code (it's not, believe me, I checked years ago), whoever had that number would probably be driven to the nuthouse with Hurley after all of the calls they'd be getting. I guess you could still give it out, though. Just tell people it's a Portland area code...

4. I like the way Ben walked right into the Orchid station where Keamy and his men were. For so long he's been putting people in harm's way "for The Island," but now we see that he is also ready to put his life on the line for The Island, which makes him a bit less of a bastard, I guess. And I loved his line to Locke: "How many times do I have to tell you? I always have a plan!" The way he was telling Locke to get into the Orchid station was pretty confusing, though, like trying to get unlimited men in Contra. Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Select, Start. Booya!

5. Ben's lockbox was also an interesting twist, though I would imagine that hiding a wooden box in the jungle for 15 years might have some negative effects on the contents of the box. Like the Dharma saltines that Locke immediately handed to Hurley. But really, why would you hide a box with a mirror and binoculars in it, on the off chance you might need it at some point in the future?? Either, where they hid the box is sort of the entryway toward the Orchid station, requiring some mirror communication before it's safe to go any further, or maybe Ben somehow went and hid it there a few weeks ago when he disappeared into the Batcave and summoned the smoke monster to come after Keamy and his men. Come to think of it, why didn't the smoke monster have more success against those guys? It scared them pretty bad, but only killed one of them? That doesn't seem very effective, especially considering the way we saw it grab Mr. Eko and slam him into the ground a few times.

6. I've said it before (#2), and I'll say it again. Jin's days are numbered. I really don't think it's a charade that Sun is keeping up for the sake of their story. I think it is going to be very sad, and I think it's going to happen in two weeks. Granted, the date of death on his tombstone was the date of the crash, that part is for the sake of their story. But yeah, he's a goner. And somebody is responsible for his death!! That was a great scene, where Sun told her father that she orchestrated the purchase of a controlling share of his company.

6a. Boy, Sun, Jack and Hurley are facing their fathers head on, right? Jack finally gets to put his father to rest, but we know that won't last long, because we've seen the visions Jack has in the future (and we also know Jack's dad is alive on The Island, or something like that). I wonder if Sun faces her dad early on, like we saw last night, and then has some other confrontation with him in the future, over the company, or maybe over something Island-related??

6b. I was also stricken with the aforementioned bumps of goose when Claire's mom showed up at the funeral and told Jack that Claire was his father's daughter. Wow. In fact, I just got goose bumps again thinking about it. Then the way he looked at Kate holding Aaron, his newly discovered nephew, conveyed such shock and a hint of disgust, probably directed at himself. Given Aaron's age at the funeral (3-4 months old, at the most) and at the end of Kate's trial (2-3 years?), I guess a pretty significant amount of time passes before Jack decides he's ready to be around Aaron again. This leads me to two questions: First, whatever happened to the right to a speedy trial? Second, exactly how far into the future was last season's finale, with Crazy Bearded Jack screaming to Kate, "We have to go back!" ?? 4 years? 5 years? (I stand by my theory that, to most people's incredible dismay, that scene is as far into the future as we are ever going to get on this show. I don't think we're ever going to know if they (or just Jack) get back or not. You heard it here first.)

7. Anybody notice how they sort of worked the tsunami into the storyline? 105 (she did say 105, right? not 108??) days after the plane crash, the typhoon washed up, blah, blah, blah; I don't remember exactly what she said at that press conference. But everybody seems to have been waiting for that tsunami to show up and affect the story, which I have always thought is a ridiculous theory. Why writers of a purely unrelated fictional show would use something so tragic as an ancillary story line would make absolutely no sense. Could you imagine doing that with the September 11 attacks, or Hurricane Katrina? Would never happen. Not this soon, at least. Anyway, I hope that's the last we hear of this typhoon, and I hope the tsunami-theorists will give it a rest already.

8. Um, so, that was a whole lot of explosives on the freighter, huh? I guess that could be why Keamy had that weird device strapped to his arm last week. So, if he planted those explosives there before he left, that's why he held up his arm and said, "You don't want to do that," when the Captain pointed his gun at him. What a dick.

9. Death is lurking around every corner. It seems to me that a whole lot of people are going to die. There are still two seasons to go, so I'm sure they won't all die in the finale in two weeks, but think about this:

The Oceanic 6 get back to the real world. Ben is still ok in the future, and according to Future Jack, Sawyer made a decision to stay on The Island, so presumably, The Island is saved from Keamy and his men. Which most likely means that Keamy and his men are going to die. And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

The Oceanic 6 get rescued, some people (Sawyer, and probably Locke, at the very least, and possibly Rose and Bernard, to stay on The Island to avoid her cancer back in the real world) decide to stay on The Island.

But what about the people on the boat, and the 4 helicopter people? What reason would they have, after getting back to civilization, to keep up the charade that the Oceanic 6 are portraying? I'm guessing the boat people and the helicopter people all end up biting the dust at some point, otherwise, they'd be around to counter the story that has been cooked up, regarding the plane crash and survivors.

I also think Michael is going to die. He couldn't die after getting off The Island, but that's because The Island wouldn't let him die, because he still had to redeem himself for what he had done. Helping Ben sabotage the boat, and helping the Oceanic 6 get rescued will take care of that redemption, and he's toast.

What about Desmond? The jury's still out on Desmond, but the fact that he so solemnly vowed never to set foot on The Island again makes his outlook a bit more bleak, considering the amount of explosives on that boat. However, I'd say that the ensuing battle between Ben and Widmore probably means Des will be around awhile, otherwise, why should we care whether Ben is able to find and kill Penny, since we only know her through Desmond anyway? My question is, why hasn't Desmond had any more flashes of the future, like the way he did with Charlie? Can't he see any of this stuff coming? Might have been helpful, before Keamy planted all that C4.

See you in two weeks.

When the Color Goes Out of My Eyes, It's Usually the Change, but Damn, Sam, I Love a Woman That Rains

(Ryan Adams, Damn, Sam)

Last week we got rid of Nikki and her homemade pasta. Can we get rid of Lisa this week? I'm going to keep asking for it until it happens. Stephanie opens the show again this week with a comment about being sad to see Nikki go home, while we get to watch her tweeze her eyebrows. Dale doesn't like the fact that everybody hates him. And Andrew drops an f-bomb! Andrew, where have you been, man??

Quickfire Challenge: Sam is back! Sam was a finalist on Season 2. Padma had a serious crush on him, and I think she was in tears when she told him to pack his knives and go home. She has finally found a way to bring him back as a guest judge (I'm assuming she's been working on this ever since he walked away from the Judges' Table for the last time). Sam tells them they need to put sexy back in the salad. When was it ever there in the first place? Spike says he wants to make a salad that makes people want to have sex after they eat it. Thanks, Captain Literal. Then Lisa starts complaining about other contestants who don't belong there and whose personalities "suck ass." Hello, Pot? This is the Kettle. You're black.

Sam likes Andrew's and Spike's, but not Lisa's. (fingers crossed!) Antonia's has great flavor and Richard has broken from tradition and served his salad inside his fauxhawk. Not really, but that thing is getting a bit intrusive. Sam picks Richard (Richard?), Stephanie (Stephanie?) and Lisa (Lisa!) as the worst; and Spike, Antonia and Dale as the best, with Spike as the his overall favorite, which I am sure Padma is very excited about, given his earlier statement about having sex after you eat his salad.

Elimination Challenge: Make gourmet boxed lunches for Chicago firefighters and police officers, and they're supposed to be healthy. Spike gets to pick an ingredient from each food group that nobody else gets to use. Andrew is in rare form tonight, working blue like he's Richard Pryor. The chefs go to Whole Foods and stand there for ten minutes while Spike uses his 10 minute head start to taunt them by waving at them from various places in the store. What a hilarious douchebag. It happens to be nighttime while they're shopping and cooking. I'm guessing that after they left for Whole Foods, a conversation such as this took place:

Padma: Sam, you hungry? You know, I just divorced this dude, so I'm, um, available ... for dinner.

Sam: Yeah, I'm hungry.

Padma: How 'bout Indian?

Colleccio visits the group and seems to like the soup Stephanie is putting together, and is then brought almost to tears when he tastes Lisa's hot sauce. Richard's burritos look pretty good, and Dale's using bison, which is awesome. Colleccio thinks everyone seems to be doing well with this challenge. After he leaves the kitchen, Lisa realizes somebody "sabotaged" her rice by turning her burner up to high. Stephanie thinks Lisa might be full of it, and Dale agrees. With about 10 minutes to go, they all start running around the kitchen like the Keystone cops, dropping things and falling over trash cans.

The police officers come in for lunch and Richard proceeds to say "Do you like burritos?" about 7,500 times. Spike is creating the illusion of scarcity by only putting two lunches on his table, with the rest of them stacked behind him. Padma chows down on some lunch real quick before dragging Sam back to the pantry to see if he can find where she hid the tandoori chicken. The judges don't seem to love Spike's chicken salad or Andrew's sushi. Padma thinks Lisa's rice isn't cooked well, and when Sam agrees with her, she looks at him with puppy dog eyes. Sam comes from a family of policemen (which, Padma hopes, means he might have access to handcuffs), which ostensibly is why he's the guest judge? I didn't quite get that.

Judges' Table: Dale and Stephanie are called up first. Ted Allen looks like he's about to start cracking up for some reason. Sam names Dale as the winner, and he gets a bottle of wine and a trip for two to visit the winery from whence it came. Dale has very quietly won five of the 20 challenges so far this season, which is fairly impressive, given the number of contestants.

Spike, Lisa and Andrew are called back as the bottom three. Oh, please, PLEASE keep Ace and Gary and get rid of Lisa!! Andrew didn't notice something in the rules of the challenge, and Padma freaks out and yells at him! I don't think she has raised her voice above "barely conscious" since I've started watching the show. It is not looking good for my boy, Andrew. Colleccio lays the smack down on Spike, telling him "unfortunately for you, my opinion is the one that matters." Go, Tom! Lisa immediately alleges sabotage of her rice. They seem to skirt this issue by telling her that the rest of her dish wasn't cooked well either. So she does what any respectable person would do, and looks for another person to throw under the bus. Andrew wasn't very happy that he was her first choice, and they have some words while the judges deliberate.

I'm bracing myself for Andrew leaving tonight. Amanda thought he could be the fan favorite this season. It would be a shame to see him go. And a shame it is. Spike looks like he just saw his puppy get run over. The number of people I like on this show was just reduced by one. Now, I am really rooting for Stephanie big time. I also hope she starts dropping an f-bomb every now and then.

And Bait and Bows and Sows and Troughs. I've Coughed Enough and I've Walked As Much.

(Tapes n' Tapes, Just Drums)

I'm a regular reader of Pop Candy, which is USA Today's pop culture blog. Whitney Matheson, the blog's writer, has just about the best job in the world, which is, from what I can gather, to watch TV, listen to music, go to movies, and just surf the web and have fun. And every so often, go do some sort of music or film festival. This is more fun than any human being should be allowed to have, and the rest of us should feel lucky that she shares it with the rest of us, bit by tasty bit.

Her latest offering is Mixwit, where you can create your own mixtape online and post it to your own blog or website, or just email it out to friends. Her first attempt (which is WAY better than mine) is "Lost Candy," featuring music that has appeared on Lost. (She's a junkie for the show as well.) Mine is, well, I'm sure you can figure it out. Just click on the tape to play. And the tape actually plays!!

I have no doubt that this might be a regular feature. Sort of like my own podcast, only, not nearly as cool.

Give Me Some Skin, Give Me Some Gin, I Want Some Wine, I LOST My Mind

(The Ramones, Lost My Mind)

You know that scene in the Matrix, where Larry Fishburne is trying to explain things to Keanu Reeves, and his brain sort of goes on overload, and he starts foaming at the mouth and passes out? That was me on the couch during last night's episode. I'm still a little shaken up, and I'm not sure if I'm really able to process what happened last night, but I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that last night was one of the best episodes in the show's run to date. My mind is officially blown.

1. So Locke's dad was a con artist, a killer, and evidently, a bit of a sexual deviant. How old was his mother, like 15 when he was born? (Roger Clemens: I see no problem with that. Karl Malone: Me either.)

2. When they showed Richard standing outside of the hospital room where little baby Locke was in the incubator, I lost it. I mean, I lost it. I was yelling ("Is that Richard? F*CK!!") and throwing my hands up, basically acting like a crazy person. And at that moment, 800 miles away in Houston, Texas, Mom looked at Andrea and said, "Ben is freaking out." True story. Exciting, I know.

3. That scene with Horace talking to Locke, where he was chopping down the same tree over and over again, that was also very Matrix-esque, the way they explained deja vu as a glitch in the system. Very creepy. And the nosebleed that kept appearing and disappearing, was kind of freaking me out as well.

3. That scene with Horace talking to Locke, where he was chopping down the same tree over and over again, that was also very Matrix-esque, the way they explained deja vu as a glitch in the system. Very creepy. And the nosebleed that kept appearing and disappearing, was kind of freaking me out as well.

3. That scene with Horace talking to Locke, where he was chopping down the same tree over and over again, that was also very Matrix-esque, the way they explained deja vu as a glitch in the system. Very creepy. And the nosebleed that kept appearing and disappearing, was kind of freaking me out as well.

4. Sorry, I couldn't resist that.

5. I loved Richard showing up at Locke's house when he was a kid, repping his "special school," like he's some sort of Charles Xavier, and I didn't catch the significance of all of the items he laid out on the table, but you just knew little Locke was going to grab that bottle of sand, right? I mean, that was Island Sand, for sure. Incidentally, when Amanda and I were in Hawaii a few years ago, I was going to put some beach sand in a little bottle like that to bring back, but Andrea told me it was a bad idea, because taking sand from the island was supposed to be bad luck. I guess Richard and Locke are under no such constraints. And why was Richard so upset when Locke held the knife? The sand and the rusty compass are ok, but the knife isn't? That was weird, considering the Locke we know now is all about the knife-play.

5a. My second "holy crap!" moment of the show was during this scene when Richard noticed the drawing that Locke had done. The f*cking smoke monster!!??!???!??!?! I don't even have anything else to say about that (other than the fact that it was a pretty crappy drawing to be hanging on the wall of a living room).

6. I loved that this was yet another episode that opened up (on Island time) with a closeup on an eye. That was how the show started, with a closeup of Jack's eye on the plane, right before the crash, last week's episode started with a closeup of Jack's eye as well, and there was also a prominent closeup of Desmond's eye in the first scene where he was reliving past experiences, when he was passed out on the floor of his and Penny's apartment with the red paint all over the floor. I'm sure there are others, but those are the only ones I can really remember. I love the continuity on this show.

7. I am willing to go along with the fact that the pilot, the drunk Mel Gibson type, may not be in favor of killing everyone on The Island, and might even be on their side (and how did he throw that backpack out of the helicopter without being noticed by Keamy?). But the captain of the ship, why is he helping Sayid, Desmond and Michael? He might not like Keamy, I don't like Keamy, but Keamy is a big dude with big guns (and some sort of explosive device strapped to his bicep?), and unless I had a dog in the fight, I'd probably be doing what Keamy wanted me to do. So maybe Captain Gault has a dog in the fight, is what I'm saying (or did, until he got capped).

8. The doctor floats ashore last week, with his throat slit, and Faraday uses the sat phone to morse code a question about it to the boat. Then this week, that morse code question hits the boat, and the doctor is still alive. And then he get his throat slit and thrown overboard!! This time shift between real time and Island Time is so weird, but here's my question: Earlier in the season, when Faraday did his little model rocket experiment, the rocket was sent from the boat and the person on the boat said that it landed. Then, like 30 minutes later, it landed on The Island. Why would that time shift reverse, then, with the doctor showing up dead on The Island before he was even killed on the boat?

9. I loved high school John Locke being rescued from the locker, then telling his guidance counselor, or whoever that was, where he could stick his stupid Mittelos science camp speech, squarely refuting the guy telling him that he was a man of science (Jack's the man of science, Locke is a man of faith). "Don't tell me what I can't do!" Awesome. He's been dealing with that his whole life.

10. Richard sure is determined to get Locke on The Island, though. He shows up three times before he's even out of high school, and can't seal the deal. Then after his accident, he sends Matthew Abbadon to his hospital as an orderly, to plant the idea of the walkabout! That was another big freakout moment for me, because as soon as Locke started talking to the orderly pushing his wheelchair, and they were making such a clear effort not to show his face while he was talking, I knew it was going to be him. So he put together the team of people in the helicopter, he visited Hurley in the asylum, and now he's basically responsible for getting Locke to Australia in the first place. I wonder who else he influenced in getting them to Australia, or on Flight 815.

(It just hit me that this is the first real flashback episode we've gotten since before the season finale last year! I read that the producers were saying that they were only going to use flashbacks from here on out if it was important to the story of The Island. I'd say this one was.)

11. One of my other favorite parts of the episode was the heartwarming "Lifesaver, son?" moment when Hurley shared his Snickers bar with Ben, while they were sitting there waiting for Locke. That was hilarious. And you know that took some serious thought on Hurley's part.

12. So, Christian Shephard was just chilling in Jacob's bungalow, having a spot of tea with his daughter, Claire, in the dark? Why does Christian Shephard fit into this part of the story!! Why can he speak on Jacob's behalf, why does he have a connection to The Island, why is Claire sitting in there like she knows exactly what's going on, why wasn't Jacob there, where was Jacob, where is Richard and the rest of the Others, why is Aaron "where he needs to be" and why is that not with Claire, ... (/gasping for air) ...

And how in the hell are they supposed to move The Island?

I'm feeling a little sick.

PS - Just to make my self sicker, I just looked up Richard Alpert on wikipedia, and he was a Harvard professor who was associated with Timothy Leary, and were both dismissed for their experiments with psychedelic drugs. He then travelled to India where he was guided barefoot from temple to temple (currently, on The Island, Richard was last seen receiving instructions from Ben to take the rest of the Others to "the temple" and wait for him there) before meeting his guru, who gave him the name Ram Dass. He then returned to the United States teaching harmony among all people and religions. That's probably all mostly irrelevant to the show, but it never hurts to learn something new.

Hey Little Sister, Who's Your Superman, Hey Little Sister, Who's the One You Want, Hey Little Sister, Shotgun!

(Billy Idol, White Wedding)

Third post in one day. I'm really burning it up, here. Let's roll...

Ace and Gary start the episode with a little rolling around in bed in their pajamas, mourning the loss of New Zealand, until Andrew realizes Spike no longer has a roommate, and enthusiastically moves into the room, taking over New Zealand's bed, presumably so he won't have to sleep so far away from Spike.

Quickfire Challenge: The guest judge this week is no guest judge. Colleccio joins Padma in the kitchen, possibly because he was lonely after eating all of the meals by himself last week. They will no longer get immunity for winning a Quickfire, and they split into two teams. They have to do a relay race of chopping, slicing, peeling, etc, and as part of it, they have to clean a monkfish, which just looks disgusting. Antonia, Stephanie, Richard and Andrew are on a team together, which is strong to quite strong. The other team is Nikki, Spike, Lisa and Dale, who hates Lisa and Nikki. Things should go well for them. Lisa narrowly avoids slicing her own hands, thank God, but that doesn't mean I like her. I don't. I hate her. Andrew makes up some time by dismantling his artichokes in record time, and Colleccio is getting a little whistle-happy, like he's some sort of high school track coach. Stephanie and Nikki are in a race for the mayonnaise, and Stephanie comes through for the win! Nice work.

And...Dale's profanity outburst makes its appearance. Right before commercials, he mentions that nobody likes each other on the team. That's gonna make it tough, I think.

Elimination Challenge: Everyone is excited for restaurant wars, since they all want to open restaurants (duh), and they seem to be sorely let down when told they're not doing that today, by Padma, who's wearing some sort of jacket like she's in Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. Their challenge, for the teams, is to cater a wedding (including cake!) for two people who happen to own a restaurant and a wedding venue. Spike's excited that the other team picked the bride, which makes sense, because in my experience, the groom's much more laid back about the wedding planning.

And...Andrew's comment regarding his culinary boner makes its appearance. Always classy, that Andrew.

The groom likes Italian food, and Nikki is Italian! The bride likes Southern food because she's from Marietta, and Richard lives in Atlanta! It's amazing! I didn't catch much else from that segment, other than they both like cake. And soup. And they could talk, or not talk, for hours. Gonna be a great marriage.

Antonia says they shouldn't risk crispy chicken because you never know if it will hold up, but then she says, "whatever, we'll survive." THAT does not bode well for Antonia, because confidence usually equals being in the bottom three on this show.

Wait, they're buying the food AND the flowers? If that's true, this is gonna be one crappy wedding. They're probably going to have Spike officiate the ceremony, and Colleccio is going to be the musical entertainment at the reception (seriously? that picture is hilarious!). Richard and Andrew are working together at Whole Foods, and with a budget of $3,000, that's going to be almost enough for a dozen tulips.

Nikki inexplicably says, "I seriously can't believe I'm making pasta again." Yeah, right. That's all she knows how to do! I haven't seen her do one thing this whole season that didn't involve pasta. She then inspires confidence in her entire team by not making a single decision, and answering "I'm not sure" to every question they ask.

Lisa thinks Dale's doing a crappy job. I knew they were going to work together well. The rest of the team seems to agree with her, though. Nikki's making pasta at 4:17 a.m. and looks like she's been smoking meth. Man, she needs her beauty rest in a bad way.

Colleccio saunters in after a good night's sleep, and for that, everyone hates him, as they have been up all night cooking. This does seem like a really hard, really cool challenge. Much better than the block party from a few weeks ago. He says Lisa's groom's cake is ugly and looks like a battleship, which isn't the worst description. It looks like a 4th grader's art project, or a science fair volcano that happens to be square.

The wedding arrives and they're all zombies, except Padma, who should spend more time attending formal events, wearing that dress, on TV. The appetizers look pretty good so far, especially the pulled-pork sandwich with a homemade pickle. That sounds awesome. Meanwhile, the bride and the groom haven't spoken to each other yet during the entire cocktail hour. I hope they at least sit next to each other at dinner. The bride's team has decided that Andrew will stay to work in the kitchen, so he's not allowed to talk to the guests. Solid strategy.

Judges' Table: First up, bride's team. Man, I hope they win. And they do! Nice. Andrew dodged a big bullet, because they didn't like his chicken or his spinach. The winner is Richard. Boring. He wants to give it to Stephanie, though, since she made the wedding cake, which is actually a very great gesture, and she gets a Crate & Barrel gift certificate for $2,000. That's awesome. The groom's team comes out to take their lumps, and there's gonna be a lot of tired, frustrated bitching by some of these people, most likely Dale and Lisa. Nikki throws everyone under the bus right off the bat by saying that although they looked to her for guidance on the Italian-style menu, she was in no way the leader of the team. Nice backbone, Nikki. Dale and Spike have it out, and this is falling apart quickly. I hope Dale started packing his knives already, so he can just get the hell out of there when they announce the loser. I hope he doesn't lose, I'd much rather see that honor go to Nikki or Lisa, but he seems resigned to it, and he seems to be telling everyone where they can stick it before he leaves.

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make. (Paul McCartney) Oh, and in the end, Nikki gets sent home. Amanda called it. She's a genius, and much better at predicting this stuff than I am, which is weird, because I watch WAY more tv than she does, so you'd think I'd have an easier time with it.

Dark in the City, Night Is a Wire, Steam in the Subway, Earth Is Afire (Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do)

(Duran Duran, Hungry Like the Wolf)

After reading this post over at Burnt Orange Nation earlier today, regarding the "Mount Rushmore" of Austin restaurants, and discussing our favorites (naturally) with Micah, I decided I'd have to delve a little deeper and really put some thought into this. We both had some obvious, no-thought-required favorites, but were having a hard time narrowing it down. Micah thought it needed to be broken down into two perspectives, "Student" and "Resident." I believe it must go one step further, adding a "Weekend Visitor" category, because there are places I might feel the need to go with only 48 hours in town that, given all the time in the world, might not be as high of a priority.

So (and this is a bad idea to do right now, considering the fact that I have not yet eaten dinner and might well devour my own right arm), below are my "Mount Rushmores" of Austin restaurants. I've tried to make sure each category has a good variety of cuisines, which, given my affinity for breakfast foods, tex-mex, and barbecue,

Student Rushmore
1. Salt Lick. Let's be honest, you knew this was coming. Not the highest quality barbecue meat I've ever had, and it would be great (or deadly) if it took less than 30-45 minutes to get there from central Austin, but this place is just awesome. If you ever have the chance, trust me. Take it. The sauce is so good, it's almost drinkable. And as a student, I could handle the all-you-can-eat situation with no problem whatsoever, really getting the most sauce for my dollar. I'm already starting to drool.

2. Trudy's. Trudy's is just about the most perfect place I've ever been. The food is really good (but not great), it was pretty close to everywhere I lived in Austin, and it's always packed with people having a great time. The bar area includes a big outdoor deck area, which, given the beautiful weather in Austin, is a must.

They also serve the legendary Mexican Martini. This is basically a really, ridiculously, overwhelmingly, knock you on your ass margarita that they serve you in a full shaker, with a martini glass. You can generally get about 7-8 martini glasses out of one shaker. Then you order another one. After your 15th or 16th glassful, you're done. Literally and figuratively. They will only serve you two Mexican Martinis, and then you're cut off from anything else at the bar. And they don't mess around.

One afternoon in my senior year of college, I was there with some friends in the afternoon and had my dos Martinis Mexcianas, and I was feeling pretty good. Then we left, went somewhere else for dinner, and ended up back at Trudy's later that night (of course). I sauntered in and tried to get a beer, and the bartender somehow remembered that I had my limit on Mexican Martinis earlier that day, and would not serve me a beer. How this is possible escapes my understanding, because they must have had hundreds of people in there that day, but after about 45 seconds of being pissed and trying to convince him to pour me a Shiner, I realized that's probably the mark of a really responsible bartender, and I walked away beerless but satisfied, my faith in humanity reaffirmed.

3. EZ's. This place, I would probably never go back to, but when I was in college I ate there ALL the time. They had just about anything you could imagine: pizza, sandwiches, burgers, chicken tenders, salads (yeah, right). And the food there was definitely inexpensive. But the main draw was that if you showed them your University of Texas student ID, you got a $2 discount, which usually knocked your meal down to around four or five bucks. Can't beat that.

4. Crown & Anchor Pub. Just a good old fashioned crappy bar with a ridiculous beer selection by the pitcher (no liquor or wine), pool tables, dart boards, an outdoor patio, and a $2.75 burger and fries. Need I say more? Fine. In addition to being really cheap, the burgers were awesome. They also had good tacos. This place was about 3 blocks from our apartment junior year. Russell and I once went there on our way home from the gym, for burgers and beers. You can tell we were real serious about our workouts.

Resident Rushmore
1. Salt Lick. Yeah, it's that good. And if I lived there, I'd be much less concerned with the trek out there.

2. Guero's. We ate at this tex-mex joint a few years ago on a trip to Austin, and everybody was really happy. They had great margaritas, and really great food. Bill Clinton ate there once (or so we were told), and the restaurant was also prominently featured in the movie Death Proof. This may have been in my Student Rushmore, but I never ate there as a student, so that settles that.

3. Kerbey Lane Cafe. This is a great breakfast place, but what immediately comes to mind when you mention it to anyone who's been there is "Kerbey Queso." Not traditionally a breakfast food, but it's Austin, and every restaurant in Austin also serves tex-mex. Their queso is awesome, loaded con carne, which is a welcome appetizer, even for an omelet or migas (migas!) or some of their awesome gingerbread pancakes. This place probably would have been in my Student Rushmore as well, but when I was there they only had one location, on Kerbey Lane, which wasn't nearly as close as the location they have since added right next to campus.

(By the way, I just put salt and ketchup on my right arm. I'm not lying when I say that this is driving me crazy with hunger. Could get ugly.)

4. Huts. Edging out Handy Andy's in Oxford, Mississippi, this might be my favorite hamburger place ever. (Which is saying something, because I do love a good burger.) And for some reason, I ALWAYS forget about it when I'm visiting Austin and never consider it for a meal. However, if I lived there, I'd probably remember to go there more often. This needs to change. I vow, this day, that on my next trip back to Austin, I am going to go to Huts and order myself an Allen Freed buffalo burger (bbq sauce and cheddar). 2 for 1 on Mondays!

Weekend Visitor Rushmore
1. Salt Lick. Only two days in town? Go to the one at the airport as soon as you get in, or on your way out of town, and you don't have to worry about that long drive!

2. Texadelphia. This is the home of the cheesesteak in Texas, and is the best hangover cure known to man. You're gonna have to trust me on this one. However, usually when I eat there, I don't get the cheesesteak. I go for the turkey sandwich. Strange, I know, and I don't quite know how to explain it, but their turkey sandwich, with the mustard blend sauce, is just amazing. If I lived there, I probably wouldn't eat there with great frequency (except for maybe those Sunday mornings when I needed a cheesesteak to get me through), because there is no shortage of amazing restaurants in Austin, but going back for a weekend, it's a tough one to pass up, if for no other reason than the nostalgia factor (and the mustard blend).

3. Trudy's. See above. I don't think I have been back to Austin and not gone to Trudy's ever. And that's a streak I'd like to see continue.

4. The Omelettry. This place is a diamond in the rough. I didn't discover it until late in my senior year of college, and I could never convince any of my friends to go there with me, so many of them have probably never heard of it. It's out of the way (over on Burnet), and it's largely visited by locals and people who live in that neighborhood. It is, however, very close to the Top Notch, which everyone remembers from Dazed & Confused. They have amazing omelets, pancakes, migas, anything you could want. But don't go there if you're in a hurry, because they don't care. And they're not a very big restaurant, so there's usually a bit of a wait. But it's worth it. Interestingly enough, this restaurant is also featured in a very long scene in Death Proof, though it is only seen from the inside, and appears in a part of the movie that supposedly takes place in Tennessee. I took Amanda, Brandy and Robert there on our trip to ACL a few years ago, and everyone loved it. Robert's been talking about it ever since.

Anybody out there agree/disagree with my choices? Anybody out there reading at all? Feel free to leave a comment and let me know your favorite Austin eateries.

It's Not Going to Stop Till You Wise Up, No, It's Not Going to Stop, So Just ... Give Up

(Aimee Mann, Wise Up)

Last night was a good night, thanks to North Carolina and Indiana voters. With strong results in Kentucky and West Virginia in the next two weeks, it seems like Obama might be able to get the Supers to start sacking up and finally making some decisions, so the party can stop tearing itself apart from within.

Undaunted by yet another disappointing showing at the polls (and unwilling to stop tearing the party apart from within), Hillary Clinton remains committed to beating a dead horse, giving us the following display of delusion from her "victory speech" in Indiana, where she picked up three more delegates than did Obama (who outgained her by 20 in North Carolina):

"I believe that Americans need a champion in their corners," she said at a rally in Indianapolis. "For too long we've had a president who has stood up and spoken out for the wealthy and the well-connected, but I don't think that's what Americans need."

Because nothing says opposite of wealthy and well-connected like a woman who had an income of $110 million over the last 7 years, and is the wife of a former president.

You Think You're a Radical, But You're Not So Radical, In Fact You're Fanatical, Fanatical!

(Flaming Lips, Free Radicals)

And now for more LOST ramblings.

I'm going public with my new radical theory that I developed (and then immediately discredited) this morning. I watched last week's episode again on Sunday, b/c Eric and Shari hadn't seen it yet, and they came over to watch. I know I said it wasn't that good of an episode, but after re-watching it, I definitely enjoyed it more, and started thinking a little more about it. Here's the new radical theory (discrediting to follow):

Jack is dead (or in a coma) and the flash-forwards are his "life" flashing before his eyes (or his coma-induced dreams).

Jack either did not survive his appendectomy procedure, or slipped into a coma during it, as it wasn't exactly done under the most stable or sterile conditions. First of all, like Rose said, people don't get sick on The Island, they get better. So, if Jack's sick, there's a reason, and it's probably pretty bad.

The flash-forwards are a product of Jack's subconscious, either how he thinks things will play out, or, more likely, how he wants things to play out. Think about this. The people who get off The Island are all people Jack likes. Kate, he's in love with. Hurley, he has always liked. Sayid has always been loyal to Jack in times of trouble (when they had Ben as their prisoner, and when Jack and Locke split off into separate camps at the beginning of this season), and Sun he wants to get off The Island so she doesn't die during childbirth.

Conversely, look at the people, by and large, who do NOT get off The Island. Juliet, who is Kate's rival for Jack's affection. Sawyer, who is Jack's rival for Kate's affection. Locke, who Jack clearly hates and even tried to kill earlier this season.

So, Jack's subconscious creates this future where the people he cares for get rescued and the people he doesn't care for do not get rescued for one reason or another. He said in the last episode that Sawyer made a choice to stay on The Island? That's very convenient, and probably would make Jack very happy, but Jack, due to his surgery, didn't yet know that Sawyer has realized that Locke is completely insane, and is helping Claire make their way back to the beach to be with the rest of the group. To me, that doesn't sound like someone who wants to stay, it sounds like someone who wants to be rescued when the time comes.

Now, because it's his own subconscious, all of his demons are still there in the future. He still sees visions of his father, and he still develops the pills/drinking problem (which he inherited from daddy as well). His subconscious also invents a reason for him not to trust "future Kate" (she's helping Sawyer!!) and be too controlling (which was the same problem he had with his first wife before the plane crash). His guilt over Charlie's death explains why his subconscious led "future Hurley" back to the nuthouse with visions of Charlie telling of bad things to come. His subconscious is also so untrusting of Ben that "future Sayid" is now working for Ben as an assassin, putting his torture/weaponry skills to work.

Now for the discrediting:

"Future Jack" made a point of telling "future Kate" that she's not even related to Aaron, implying that he knows he is related to Aaron. That realization has not yet happened in Island time, unless it has happened and we don't know about it yet, and it might be revealed to us in an on-island flashback. If that is the case (which it probably isn't), then add Aaron to the list of people Jack cares about, since he's his nephew. Or maybe even wants a little kid to be taken to safety - could you blame him for that?

I know that the producers have said that the explanation of the Island is not going to involve being in someone's dreams or in someone's head. BUT, this theory isn't an explanation of The Island, it's an explanation of the future events we've seen. Still possible that it could happen.

The Light Was On But It Was Dim, Revolver's Been Turned Over, and Now It's Ready Once Again, The Radio is Playing Crimson and Clover

(Elliott Smith, Baby Britain)

Happy Cinco de Mayo, everybody. In keeping with the festivity of this joyous occasion (and just to make sure this blog doesn't become a vehicle solely for Lost and Top Chef ramblings), I've decided to write about some of the new music I've been listening to lately. (I know that doesn't seem very festive, but I have a strange interpretation of some holidays. A few years ago, I joined a gym on Martin Luther King Day.)

A buddy of mine at work gave me about 4G worth of music a few months ago, and I've been slowly digesting my favorites. Most of the bands are ones I hadn't heard of at the time, which automatically makes them cool, however, some of these albums are at least a few years old already, which makes me decidedly less cool. I've also posted a song or two for each of the bands, so you can consider this your indie music sampler, courtesy of the good folks here at Deep Chrome Canyons (i.e., me). Most of this music is on the mellow side, so if you're looking to get your socks rocked off, you should look elsewhere.

Ambulance LTD (Ambulance LTD)
Ambulance LTD put out their self-titled first album 7 years ago, and they have already changed over most of the band at least once, which makes me a little late in getting around to listening to them. I dig their laid back sound, and I appreciate that you can hear the Velvet Underground's influence, especially on "Primitive (the Way I Treat You)".

By the way, and this is almost entirely irrelevant, but I just finished reading a book called "Please Kill Me: An Uncensored Oral History of Punk," and although it ended rather abruptly without covering anything in the past 25 years (and barely even getting into the 1980s at all), it was a really great account of the late 1960s-early 1980s punk scene. It focused heavily on the Velvet Underground, MC5, Television, Patti Smith, the Heartbreakers, the New York Dolls, and Iggy and the Stooges, with not enough coverage on the Ramones, and not NEARLY enough coverage on The Clash or the Sex Pistols.

Anyway, it's basically sex, drugs, and rock and roll. I mean, it's a cliche for a reason, right? Everybody was shooting up, and everybody was sleeping with everybody, men, women, it didn't matter. And I kind of figured that it was a very free-spirited era, but I was fairly shocked by some of the accounts, especially some of the stories about Lou Reed. Dude was a freak.

Ambulance LTD - Primitive (the Way I Treat You)
Ambulance LTD - Michigan
Buy Ambulance LTD on Amazon.com

Beach House (Beach House)
I was excited to get ahold of Beach House's first album (also self-titled, also a few years old) after reading about them in The Big Takeover, which happens to be the best music magazine I have ever laid my eyes on (subscribe for 2 years for only $20!!). This magazine, which I've been a devoted reader of for about 3 years now, has introduced me to a host of new music, including The Decemberists, who are one of my favorites. So, when I read a feature or an interview of theirs about a band I've never heard of, I tend to give it a lot of weight, and more often than not, it's worth a small investment to be able to give a listen. Luckily, this was in the trove of music I got from Louie, so my investment was unnecessary.

They're MUCH more mellow than I was execting, though to be fair, I was reading a review about their new album (released in February of this year), and I haven't heard that one yet. I like it, but it's not something I could listen to over and over again, for fear that I'd slip right into a coma. One thing I like about them is that they have a female singer. I really dig a rock band with a female singer. And I'm not talking about "chick music" like the Indigo Girls or Tori Amos (who I also like). I'm talking about chicks who rock, like Ann Wilson of Heart, Corin Tucker of Sleater-Kinney, and Beth Gibbons of Portishead. Now, Beach House isn't anywhere near the thunderstorm of rock like Heart or Sleater-Kinney, but Victoria Legrand's Nico-inspired vocals (and I promise I'm going to stop referencing the Velvet Underground) really blend well with their slow, sometimes eerie keyboard-based songs. Give them a listen, it's free. If you don't like it, you can turn it off. (Oh, and they don't start off all of their songs by counting, but these two happen to do that.)

Beach House - Apple Orchard
Beach House - Heart and Lungs
Buy Beach House on Amazon.com

The Dexateens (Lost and Found)
This is not one of the albums from my friend's stash. This one I downloaded a few months ago, legally, of course, and you can do so yourself right here from the band's website if you like what's below! The Dexateens are probably the hardest rocking band I'm writing about tonight. They're a throwback to classic rock, with a Southern edge. Sort of like, two parts Skynyrd, one part Faces (Yeah, Rod Stewart used to be a badass. Hard to believe nowadays, but it was definitely true.).

Lost and Found is the fourth album for this Tuscaloosa, Alabama, based group. They've been around for 10 years, currently on Birmingham-based label Skybucket Records. I'm going to have to check out some of their other acts, because this album is right up my alley. Hopefully they'll be in the ATL soon, because this band seems like they'd be awesome to see live.

This album is probably the reason for this entire post, because after I first downloaded it and listened to it back in February (or March?), I considered writing about it, but I just hadn't fully digested it yet, and I wasn't sure if there was really enough to say. I mean, I love music, and I love writing about music, but I'm no Lester Bangs. Anyway, after getting all this other music from my buddy awhile back, and listening to a bunch of it enough to get a feel for what I liked, I decided I'd revive my idea of writing about the Dexateens, but expand it into this longer, more comprehensive idea of writing a little bit about a bunch of bands. And since Amanda's still in New Orleans until tomorrow night, and I've got nothing but time to have a few beers, grill some hamburgers, and listen to music, I figured I'd put that time to good use.

The Dexateens - Lost and Found
The Dexateens - Enough of Nothing

Great Lake Swimmers (Ongiara)
Sort of a "Band of Horses lite," Great Lake Swimmers are one of Canada's great exports, along with Steve Nash and maple syrup. Oh, how I love the maple syrup. Any band that can pull off prominently featuring a banjo is alright in my book. They're folky, sort of Sufjan Stevens-esque, which I love, but without the very strange storytelling. They also have a bit of Neil Young in them, which is probably a prerequisite for any up and coming Canadian rock band. This album (their third) came out in 2007, and truthfully, if I'd heard it last year, it probably would have cracked my top 10 for the year. "Changing Colours" is a beautiful, beautiful song - probably my favorite from this album. This is also a very mellow album, but not quite as mellow as Beach House. More folky-mellow, whereas Beach House was more sleeping-pills-induced-mellow. Both are good, but in different ways.

Great Lake Swimmers - Your Rocky Spine
Great Lake Swimmers - Changing Colours
Buy Onigara on Amazon.com

I'd planned to write about a few more bands (Bon Iver, Grizzly Bear, Jamie Lidell, to name a few, though I probably won't get around to it anytime soon, because I already did my favorites of the bunch), but I'm getting kind of tired, so I'm going to go watch the Spurs/Hornets game. I've been living the bachelor life all weekend, and I've got one more night to lie on the couch with a Rolling Rock and watch basketball, so I'm gonna take advantage.

LOST In Love and I Don't Know Much, Was I Thinking Aloud? I Fell Out of Touch.

(Air Supply, Lost In Love)

Happy?

I was nowhere near as captivated by this episode as I was by last week's, when Ben "don't call me Henry" Linus went all Jason Bourne on those dudes in the desert. We did get some minor answers, but I think I like it better when they introduce more mystery, and there wasn't that much mystery introduced last night. Although, to be fair, I was still in a bit of a food coma from the steaks and grilled veggies Amanda and I had for dinner.

1. Jack proposing to Kate might have been the single most boring moment of this entire series that didn't involve Nikki and/or Paulo. I don't need non-stop action all the time, but if I wanted to watch a chick flick, I'd pop in my You've Got Mail dvd. (Disclosure: I don't own You've Got Mail on dvd. I own it on vhs. But I don't have a VCR. Life's funny like that sometimes.)

2. I certainly did not mind Kate's casual wear. That is one smokin' hot someone-else's-baby-raising woman.

3. Speaking of raising someone else's baby, in the beginning, before we saw Kate in the shower, Amanda nailed that Jack was at Kate's house, but how awesome was it that Jack stepped on one of Aaron's toys and it just happened to be the Millenium Falcon?? For those of you who are inexplicably not Star Wars fans, what I'm referring to is that Luke Skywalker was raised by his Uncle Owen after his father was "killed in battle". Raised by his uncle? Sound like someone else who got off the island and calls Kate "mommy?"

3a. At some point, my guess is before they leave the island, Jack finds out that Claire is his father's daughter. (Christian Shephard sure has spread his seed, hasn't he?) That's why Jack didn't want to be with Kate (and see Aaron) after the trial, which Kate conveniently alluded to last night with her "I'm so glad you changed your mind" comment. Snoozeville. Now go get me a beer so I can wash down these painkillers.

4. I almost crapped my pants when drunk Mel Gibson ran out of the jungle with the first aid kit. I like that guy, though, and the tension between the helicopter people and the rest of the boat people is good drama. Sawyer should have taken out that Keamy guy while he was hiding in the bushes.

5. The scene when Jack went to visit Hurley would have been the creepiest scene in the show, if it wasn't for the creepiness of Claire waking up and seeing Christian Shephard cuddling with Aaron in the jungle. Seriously, that gave me the willies. He looked like he was some sort of zombie or something, like he was about to eat the baby. I couldn't tell if he was holding the baby because he knew it was his grandson, or because he was hallucinating and thought it was a candied ham.

5a. And how about that scene with Hurley? "You're not supposed to raise him?" We're to assume that he's referring to Aaron. Either way, Hurley's not doing very well.

6. I love that Sawyer sleeps with a gun in his hand. And Sawyer chose to stay on the island! So, we know that it wasn't necessarily a case of the Oceanic 6 saving their own asses at everyone else's expense. What was it that Kate was doing for him, though? (I was hoping she'd say she was doing something for Ben. That would have been jarring, to say the least.) If he chose to stay on the island, what could he need her to do back in the real world? Maybe something regarding his daughter? I never really thought there was a daughter, I totally thought he was getting conned by that chick and the warden, in that episode where he was in prison last season, but maybe there really is a daughter.

7. Miles has turned out to be a pretty cool character - his "I see dead people" thing is not bad at all. I thought it was awesome how he heard Rousseau and Carl when they came upon that clearing in the jungle. He's slowly taking over from Daniel "this tie must be double-knotted, otherwise I'd have taken it off by now" Faraday as my favorite of the four helicopter people. Bringing up the rear, again, is Charlotte Staples Lewis, despite the fact that she speaks Korean and evidently has no control over her facial expressions. Seriously, what was she doing with her face when Jin walked away after their little discussion? I've never seen anyone make that expression before. If anybody has this episode on their DVR, go back and watch this part, and tell me if you can figure out what this is supposed to be.

8. Who is this Bernard dude? He's a dentist, right? I get that he would be helpful in a surgical procedure, but last week he's deciphering morse code, and last season he's a sharpshooter in the beach attack?? A dentist? Got to be some more to that.

Next week should be good stuff. Btw, check out that picture of the Lost character toys at the top. Hurley's accessory is a scale. Hilarious.

Let's Go Down to the Sunset Grill, We Can Watch the Working Girls Go By

(Don Henley, Sunset Grill)

You can't buy happiness like this. Actually, you can. It's on sale at Home Depot. Big BIG thanks to Andrea, Michelle and Justin for this big-ass grill they gave us for our wedding gift. I don't think Amanda quite knows what's in store. Our dinners have just been revolutionized. I am now one step closer to becoming Bobby Flay.

That's right. Ribeyes and grilled veggies, for the inauguration. Meet the new boss. And a flip-up beverage holder.